There are no ‘gay’ people

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The words ‘hashtag’, ‘selfie’ and ‘tweep’ were among 150 new words added to the Merriam-Webster's dictionary this year; and with selfies being taken by everyone from Barack Obama to Pope Francis to Kim Kardashian, it’s little wonder this word is among those making the list.

While the evolution of language has, with technology, become all the more rapid, language remains one of the most vital tools underpinning a society. It is language that shapes reality for the members of a society, allowing us to attach meanings to things. Words convey reality and the better a language is used, the more precisely concepts can be understood. Inversely, the poor use of language can misinform a person or a whole society, about a particular truth.

Enter the word ‘gay’. Originating in 12th century England the original meaning was ‘joyful’ or ‘carefree’. By the end of the 20th century, the… click here to read whole article and make comments



Understanding male same-sex attraction

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This documentary from Family Watch International is a very helpful introduction to understanding male same-sex attraction. It argues that no one is "born gay" and that many people with unwanted same-sex attraction have been able to change.

In 30 minutes, it packs in research data, interviews with top experts in the field, and powerful testimonials from four men who speak honestly, openly and compelling about what it was like for them to develop same-sex attraction and live the homosexual lifestyle. 

click here to read whole article and make comments



A handout for queer non-monogamists

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It is getting harder week by week to deny that acceptance of same-sex “marriage” creates a precedent for social and legal recognition of other types of sexual relationships. The Auckland Council, a ratepayer funded local authority in New Zealand, where same-sex marriage was legalised last year, has given a small handout for an event promoting polyamory, Family First reports.

The grant comes from the council’s Community Development and Safety Committee. “Safety” is often the rubric under which public recognition is invoked for sexual fringe groups.

"It is incredible that with the dust having only just settled on the same-sex marriage debate, Auckland Council sees fit to fund an event promoting discussion around polyamory and questioning monogamous marriages,” says Bob McCoskrie, National Director of Family First NZ.

He adds that these groups should fund themselves, and councils should stay out of the… click here to read whole article and make comments



Are gays’ brains better than mothers’ brains?

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A fascinating and widely-publicised study suggests that men’s brains are “very plastic” and will mimic a woman’s emotional circuits if their infant lacks a mom.

A leading journal, the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, has published a study conducted in Israel based on work by neuropsychologist Ruth Feldman of Bar-Ilan University and others. Researchers compared the MRI brain scans of 89 mothers and fathers watching videos of themselves caring for their infants. According to Reuters:

Having a baby alters new mothers' brain activity, researchers have found, and a new study adds the first evidence of such changes in the brains of gay men raising children they adopted through surrogacy.
The men's pattern of brain activity resembles that of both new mothers and new fathers in the study.

To get a baseline, an MRI was also taken of the subjects watching a video that… click here to read whole article and make comments


MONDAY, 26 MAY 2014

Don’t meddle with marriage any more

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Youthfulness and Green party leanings make approval of group marriage more likely among New Zealanders, according to a new survey.

A year ago the country’s politicians legalised same-sex marriage after a “marriage equality” campaign. The new poll of 1022 people by Curia Market Research asked people whether they favoured such equality for polygamy and marriages involving three or more people.

It found that there is overwhelming opposition to any further redefining of marriage to include such arrangements. Asked, “Do you personally think the law should allow three or more people to marry each other?” just 10 percent of respondents said yes, while 81 percent rejected the notion.

However, 16 percent of under 30s (compared to 4 percent of over 60s) and one in four Green party supporters approve of group marriage.

Most New Zealanders think there is no danger of such a development. Asked, How likely… click here to read whole article and make comments



Love in a time of unreality

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I have constantly to recalibrate the sense of unreality enveloping the marriage issue because the distance from reality seems to grow day by day. One of my touchstones is Richard Cohen’s column in the Washington Post, whenever he addresses the subject, as he just has again in his May 20 column. The occasion was the release of an HBO film, “The Normal Heart,” a movie version of Larry Kramer’s play about the beginning of the HIV-AIDS epidemic and the apparent indifference of President Ronald Reagan and New York Mayor Ed Koch. The air of unreality in this column could not be thicker.

We begin, of course, with his experience of homophobia as a mere lad of 16, when some yahoo told him about how he beat up homosexuals with brass doorknobs. In benighted America of that time, Cohen tells us, “we knew of racism and anti-Semitism,”… click here to read whole article and make comments



Repudiating the calculated decision to deprive children of mothers

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David van Gend is a family doctor and head of the Australian Marriage Forum. He is always an eloquent, hard-hitting speaker, but in this 25-minute video he excels. Drawing on years of experience as a GP and keen political instincts, he presents a convincing case why governments should not legalise same-sex marriage. 

click here to read whole article and make comments



The sad end of a gay marriage

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Marriage didn’t do this gay couple much good. Episcopal Bishop Gene Robinson and his partner of 25 years, Mark Andrew, had a civil union ceremony in 2008, which automatically became a “marriage” when New Hampshire legalised same-sex marriage in 2009.

On May 3 they announced their divorce.

In a comment written for The Daily Beast Robinson made the best of it, suggesting that it showed how alike homosexual and heterosexual marriages are:

“It is at least a small comfort to me, as a gay rights and marriage equality advocate, to know that like any marriage, gay and lesbian couples are subject to the same complications and hardships that afflict marriages between heterosexual couples.”

He gave no reason for the separation and said he still loved his erstwhile husband:

“My belief in marriage is undiminished by the reality of divorcing someone I… click here to read whole article and make comments



Much ado about sex; nothing to do with race

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marriage-raceA mixed race couple demonstrating for gay marriage hold up a sign saying, “Once our marriage was once illegal too.”

Is that a just comparison? Is opposition to same-sex marriage at all like opposition to inter-racial marriage? Does protecting the freedom to speak and act publicly on the basis of a religious belief that marriage is the union of a man and woman amount to the kind of laws that banned inter-racial marriage?

No, and no, says Ryan Anderson, a US expert on the marriage issue, in a background paper published by the Heritage Foundation. First, because the belief that marriage is a man-woman union is a reasonable belief, and second, because when they lead their lives and run their businesses in accordance with that belief, citizens deny no-one equality before the law. 

A reasonable belief...

Great thinkers throughout human history—and from every political community up until the year 2000—thought it… click here to read whole article and make comments



The legal maze of twins with three mothers

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erika k / flickr   

A case concerning twin girls has come before the Court of Appeal in the UK that almost defies imagination in its complexity of relationships. If it weren’t a disturbing harbinger of things to come, it could almost be dismissed as a comedy of errors.

The story starts in the 1990s with two lesbians beginning an ‘intimate relationship’. At some point the relationship became platonic but the two women continued to share a house together until 2012. They disagree over the point at which their relationship became platonic.

While the relationship was still ‘intimate’, following unsuccessful attempts by the one of the women (the respondent) to conceive using her own eggs, the other (the appellant) agreed to donate her own eggs so that the respondent could become pregnant. She donated eggs which were fertilised with sperm from an… click here to read whole article and make comments


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Conjugality deals with the true nature of marriage and the challenges it faces today. Our current focus is on the campaign to legalise same-sex marriage. We'd love to get your comments and suggestions. Send an email to

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