TUESDAY, 16 SEPTEMBER 2014

Married at First Sight

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The News Story - 'Married at First Sight' and our attitude towards marriage

Today’s depressingly high divorce rate prompts more queries than ever before on what makes a marriage stick.  More money?  More education?  A bigger wedding?  Cable’s FYI Network has speculated on just this question in its new hit reality series, “Married at First Sight,” in which three couples who have been matched based on compatibility tests meet on their wedding day, then spend the next month figuring out if they want to stay married.
 
This week’s conclusion led to more media chatter on making marriage work.  Stacia L. Brown of the Washington Post speculates that the show’s success is due to its appeal to a deeper societal loneliness.  “[A]s you root for the couples to work through their issues and ‘beat the odds,’” she writes, “you become increasingly aware that the experience isn’t really about them. It’s about… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

WEDNESDAY, 10 SEPTEMBER 2014

The link between divorce and mortality

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The News Story - Famous Wedding Resort to Offer "Divorce Packages"

An upstate New York hotel famous for its lavish weddings is about to get into a new side of the marriage business—divorce.
 
Reports the New York Post, “For a flat $5,000 fee, the divorcing parties are put up in separate rooms at Saratoga Springs’ Gideon Putnam Resort for a weekend and work with a mediator to finalize the details into a signed agreement.” Some of the divorcing parties will even broadcast their negotiations via a reality television show.  Rob Sgarlata, a spokesperson for the hotel, does not believe that providing a venue for both weddings and divorce proceedings in the same weekend will “tarnish the hotel’s reputation as a wedding venue.”  According to Sgarlata, the organizers of these divorces “want people to get into an environment that minimizes the stress of the situation and that’s… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

THURSDAY, 4 SEPTEMBER 2014

Working mothers: to everything, a season

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mum and babyMyles Grant - Flickr via Wikimedia

 

The much celebrated rise of women in education and the workforce has given rise to the much debated second shift syndrome, in which mothers who work full time come home to do most of the childcare and other domestic work (cooking, shopping, laundry…), and to why women can’t have it all tracts from high-powered career women who want to see more of their children. However, Neil Gilbert at Family Studies notes a recent trend that may see more mothers and couples finding a better work-life balance.

According to the Pew Research Centre, for three decades starting around 1967, the proportion of stay-at-home mothers in the United States fell steeply – from 49 percent to 23 percent in 1999. That includes both married women with a working husband… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

TUESDAY, 2 SEPTEMBER 2014

The first divorce selfie

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This divorce selfie might not actually be the first, but at any rate it has happened. And that’s certainly enough to sadden the heart. Here’s what gets me about this photo:

It normalises divorce

Once again, our society is managing to normalise something that shouldn’t be normal. It’s making a huge, life-changing and heartbreaking choice look like an everyday, run-of-the-mill event. Sadly, people already go into marriage with the option of divorce in the back of their head – selfies like this are only going to fuel that attitude.

It makes divorce look pain-free

As happy as they might look in this selfie, divorce is not a happy business. Couples might convince themselves that everything has ended in a peaceful and amicable manner, and yet there are layers of hurt underneath. You can’t just commit your life to a person and then let it go with a smile and a happy… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

SATURDAY, 30 AUGUST 2014

The rules of engagement

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Yes, I know, I’ve only been engaged for two weeks. Two weeks and four days, actually, and yes, I am counting. But amidst all the happiness and excitement, I feel like I’ve already leant a few lessons that I plan on keeping in mind until the wedding. Let me tell you about them:

Make sure you focus on the marriage, not just the wedding day

There’s nothing wrong with being excited about the wedding day. But I’m trying to focus on the fact that the most important thing is the marriage, and the world won’t end if my dress is a little less puffy than expected or the wedding singer hits a bad note – being aware of this is probably the difference between a psycho bridezilla and a calm, happy bride-to-be. It also prevents me from getting caught up in materialism, since I know that the wedding is a celebration of our… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

TUESDAY, 26 AUGUST 2014

Non-married mums are less likely to breastfeed

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The News Story - 22 candid photos that show how beautiful breastfeeding really is

August is National Breastfeeding Awareness Month, and news sources have brimmed with cheerful stories on the positive effects of breastfeeding.  In addition to providing baby with the best nutrition, breastfeeding cuts the risk of post-partum depression, helps reduce the risk of breast cancer, and has a host of other good health effects for both mom and baby.
 
Over at the Huffington Post, Caroline Bologna spotlights photographer and mother Leilani Rogers in her “Public Breastfeeding Awareness Project.”  “Inspired by her reluctance to nurse in public,” reports the story, Rogers is “seeking to normalize the sight of breastfeeding and show support for other nursing moms.”  Many other photographers have joined the project, which is now global.  Kayla Gonzales told the Huffington Post, “I do feel strongly that breastfeeding is the standard for… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

WEDNESDAY, 20 AUGUST 2014

Married parents vs cohabiting parents

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The News Story - More unmarried moms are living with partners
A new study by the National Center for Health Statistics reveals "a baby frenzy happening among unmarried couples who live together."
 
According to the report, 58% of all unmarried births now occur to cohabiting couples, compared to 41% in 2002.  Reports NBC, "Although some studies show that living together may be less stable than traditional marriage, the new report shows that half of births to non-married, cohabitating women were planned."  "We don't feel the need to rush to the altar," one such mother told NBC--though she also says that the couple does in fact plan to marry when they feel more financially prepared.
 
Finances, it seems, often play a crucial role in such decisions to forego marriage, even while welcoming children.  Child Trend senior research Elizabeth Wildsmith comments that the desire for marriage continues, but… click here to read whole article and make comments

 

MONDAY, 18 AUGUST 2014

Anyone can do the house-work; but who is doing the home-work?

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Did you know that it is women who do the majority of housework? Even mothers of young children, who are holding down fulltime jobs, seem to spend more time than men with a mop and vacuum in hand.

This, however, is not new information; every few months you can find a news report somewhere highlighting the situation. The most recent Household, Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia Survey (HILDA), shows that in households where men are the main breadwinners, they do 14.5 hours of housework a week, compared to 27.6 hours by women.

That may seem understandable, but even when the situation is reversed, and women are the main breadwinners, the data still shows that men are not taking up their fair share of the load. Needless to say, if both the man and woman are in the workforce it seems only right that they contribute to… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

WEDNESDAY, 13 AUGUST 2014

The surprising benefit of a stay-at-home mother

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mom-son

 

Mothers are the great glue which binds society together. They organise, they volunteer, they nurture. And, when they are not around, you notice it. Look at any of those etiolated "communities" where every woman is a worker and you will see what I mean.

But the bigger (and bitter) argument for stay-at-home mothers concerns children. In Britain, in recent years, the debate has been closing down. Through tax and benefit changes, successive governments have made it ever harder for a woman to absent herself from the workforce to bring up her own children. 

Whitehall would much rather encourage the creation of an army of childminders and nursery workers (which it can, inter alia, not only conscript but heavily regulate).

Some of these women do sterling work. Others, perhaps a majority, are young women with limited prospects. The authorities recognise this. That is one reason the way… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

TUESDAY, 12 AUGUST 2014

Premature death linked to divorce

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The News Story - Top 7 worst states for divorce

An ABC News story this week highlighted the top 7 “worst” states for divorce, as indicated by the filing fee, length of minimum separation period, residency requirements, and length of processing period.  “Divorce can take an emotional toll on a family,” says ABC, “but the filing and legal process can add another headache in these seven states.
 
Topping this list, with a mandatory six-month separation period in which the couple must live completely apart, is Vermont.  Nebraska, New York, California, Arkansas, South Carolina, and Rhode Island also make the list.
 
With a filing fee of $157 and a processing period of 420 days, Nebraska “easily ranks in the top of the worst states to get a divorce,” according to divorce attorney Bruce Provda.  Interestingly, however, Nebraskans also marry around the age of… click here to read whole article and make comments


 

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Family Edge looks at news and trends affecting the family in the light of human dignity. Our focus is the inspiring, creative, humorous, annoying, ridiculous, and dangerous ideas in the evening news. Send tips and brainwaves to the editor, Tamara Rajakariar, at tamara.rajakariar@ mercatornet.com


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