January
27th
  1:26:15 AM

Babies in bars—a singular offence?

UK pub sceneA twenty-something New Yorker living in an area of Brooklyn where she finds “the mommy culture run amok” (most residents have children and she does not) complains that she is running into infants in -- of all places -- her favourite bars. Double strollers on the streets and toddlers in cafes are bad enough, she frets, but “bar-babies” are the limit.

No matter what breeders might think, bars are not family-friendly. If I am out drinking and sobbing about a bad breakup, I don’t want my cries to compete with those of an infant sitting next to me. If I go to the bathroom to correct my wayward mascara at the end of a long weekend night, I don’t want to watch a baby being wiped down on the soggy sink counter.

Nor do I want to be scolded by parents like the ones at the Gate, a favorite bar, where friends have witnessed a few mothers with toddlers actually wagging their fingers when young people cursed too loudly or got a little sloppy, while conveniently overlooking the fact that alcohol, blaring punk rock and drunken partiers are not pediatrician-approved.

You can see from these quotes that the woman has a problem with babies, and it’s not that she sees them being abused by their well-heeled parents. No, it’s that she does not want them to intrude on her social life at all just now, thank you. But is she right about the bar bit?

Personally, I think some babies in bars is okay. It is no sin, and, in (say) a cold weather climate with strict public consumption and open container laws--not to mention unaffordable housing for families and the cost of sitters--I don't see why a parent couldn't bring their tot to a bar in order to have a beer with friends. In Ireland it is quite common to have a family booth: a room without a table with the walls lined with cushioned benches. The kids play on the floor while the parents gab and drink.

Laying arbitrary social norms on parents and parenting in order to maintain a singles culture that can be brash, drunk, and crass without any guilt seems a detestable thing to me. Given the bar scene, one must be careful, but my wife and I have often brought little nursing infants to restaurants and sat in the bar for a long while waiting for tables.

It is not my general cup of tea, but there is nothing wrong with it.



 
about this blog | Bookmark and Share

Search this blog

 Subscribe to FamilyEdge
rss RSS feed of posts

 Recent Posts
Declaration of 2013 World Congress of Families
21 May 2013
World Congress of Families 2013
19 May 2013
Rise of the stay-at-home dad
15 May 2013
Record proportion of new mothers are college educated
13 May 2013
Brenda Heist case reveals increase in mothers who leave their children
11 May 2013

 MercatorNet blogs
Style and culture: Tiger Print
US political scene: Sheila Liaugminas
News about bioethics: BioEdge
From the editors: Conniptions

 Archive
May 2013 | Apr 2013 | Mar 2013 | more >>

 From MercatorNet's home page

Jolie’s Choice
20 May 2013
Angelina Jolie's decision to have a double mastectomy made headlines around the world. But is she sending women the right…

We’re all mad here
21 May 2013
That's the message of the new edition of the bible for American psychiatrists, DSM-5. Diagnostic inflation is about to become…

A fight for equality or a war on difference?
20 May 2013
To invite the government to give us phony equalities by recognising gay marriage is to invite greater state intervention into…

Star Trek: Into Darkness
20 May 2013
The familiar characters face very contemporary issues of terrorism and militarism in this nicely characterised film.

How legal euthanasia changed Belgium for ever
17 May 2013
The ideology of absolute self-determination has become sacred and unquestionable.


 Tags
parents, anger, birth control, video games, daycare, sexual behaviour, parenthood, Spain, media, child behaviour, books, emerging adults, girls, obesity, research, pornography, child safety, adolescents, violence, baby boomers, commitment, prostitution, language, child poverty, media ethics, child development, European Union, United Nations, happiness, sex education, internet, names, psychology, gender equality, child welfare, unemployment, teen pregnancy, United States, friendship, working mothers, South Africa, AIDS, education of children, New Zealand, morality, immigration, homeschooling, youth, Sweden, character education, social media, single motherhood, Facebook, children's health, family relationships, self-control, family, health, polygamy, economics, television, family economics, celebrities, family values, same-sex parenting, work, homosexuality, young adult, parental rights, family meals, divorce, cohabitation, Hollywood, child wellbeing, social networking, internet safety, adoption, men, HIVAIDS, technology, marriage, Canada, dating, brain, ageing, work-life balance, ageing population, families, Africa, Barack Obama, large families, fatherhood, contraception, fertility, childcare, HomeMakers Project, USA, family policy, motherhood, women, parenting, family breakdown, teenage pregnancy, recession, France, child obesity, UK, texting, education, gender, modesty, Australia, mothers, children, abstinence, sleep, same-sex marriage, China, mental health, child abuse, suicide, abortion, teenagers, pregnancy, fathers, National Marriage Project, sexualisation of children, one-child policy, family structure, schools, fashion, feminism, religion, trafficking, demography, gendercide, smacking, character, poverty, adolescence, boys,